Inquisitor Betrayer Official Band Page
"without music, life would be a mistake"

Beowulf is part of a double CD. Beowulf is side one as they might say. A whole CD onto it's self. I have taken much liberty in adapting the Great Work Beowulf of old. Here is that adaptation.

My name is Beowulf
and here is but one of my Great Deeds.

I am strongest of men alive, in my day. Mighty and noble am I. One day I heard a great terrible evil had befallen a friendly King in an area of space not far from my home planet. I called for a great ship to bring me to that shore so that I may perform my service. Another deed to add to my growing list.

When I arrived, I was not openly welcomed. Understandable as these were times of forces that may be hostile may try to gain entry. The guardians asked me questions. Once they knew my name, all was well. Such evil looking menaces of metal they are made of. I would hope for a tie if I crossed one of these floating cities of war.

I followed the path on my ship navigation console to the Great Hall, where I have heard the problem, Grendel has made mischief, mayhem and death. Once we entered the Hall, the King’s Protector greeted us. Another hunk of metal with legs. We introduced ourselves and our intentions. Challenged a bit by him I spoke of my history and breeding to him. We understood each other after this. At least I thought.

As I sat in the Great Hall, waiting, a young warrior came up to me, seemed a bit boisterous and his intent was to be above me in my past deeds. Turns out he was Unferth, Ecglaf's son. He asked of my contest with Brecca. Years ago this was and I already added this to my list of Great Deeds. I re-counted the facts to him. I ended it with the slaying of the nine sea monsters and I challenged him back by saying I have not heard of any deeds done near mine by him. Oh the look he gave me. If I did not know who he was he would have been introduced to my fist. But luck has it, the talk turned to Grendel, the half beast half machine or something. While the Bard played the tune the tail was spun how Grendel dances to the music of Inquisitor Betrayer while he ponders his woe upon these ‘men’ in the Great Hall. This bard disturbs me. Well not as much as this culture of adapting flesh to machine.

Something about the music this beast dances too drove me to say out loud and proclaim “ I will kill Grendel with my bare hands since he uses not a weapon. What honor is there if I have to use a weapon to kill such a creature that uses none?” Maybe it was the drink?

So we all sat in the Great Hall, telling tales, drinking and merriment. One by one my men laid to rest. Waited did I for Grendel. I know he will be paying us a visit sometime this night. Disappointed this night I wasn’t. Grendel waited till the wee hours, came in under the mists and clouds. Swung open the doors and proceeded to kill, eat and maim as many as he could. Till he came my way. I grabbed his arm, with such a grip Grendel shrieked in terror. Grendel must have thought, what demon is this with such strength and why attack me? Arm, maybe I should say, something that is used as such.

We fought, Grendel and I, others joined in but to no good did they do. Grendel’s skin was strong, nada they had would pierce this shell. Grendel would swing his huge arm and many would fly onto the walls, broken if not dead. Only by brute strength did I prevail. I held on, tight and tighter. Ripping and pulling till I ripped his arm off. This night Grendel would know, his end is at my hands! Grendel gave up his right to be among the living this night and I had a trophy!

Only by some animal instinct did Grendel make off without his shoulder, arm and claws. Off into the dark he ran, blood showing a trail a blind man could have followed. A trail of bright green shown off in the far distance.

Much talk and rejoicing followed the remainder of the night and into the following days. So many seemed so happy that Grendel has returned to Hell. I think days, as I was partaking in some drink after my battle. I heard many a story told in those hours perhaps? I know not, I can’t remember all. I do remember being given many a golden and jewel encrusted item for my good deed. I also seem to remember some smart ass saying, “No good deed goes unpunished”. Surly these were the words of one in envy of my greatness. Ah, the drink, such sweet pleasure.

As if those words were accursed, unbeknownst to me, Grendel had managed to return to what home or place he called home to his Mother. Now she was not a happy camper. Upon seeing what damage was done by me, she let out a angry cry and plotted in such a manner as to began my very own end. I doest recall that bard again playing Inquisitor Betrayer, this time a different tune. Oh, the hairs of my neck prick at the memory of that tune. I can hear Grendel’s mom’s cry even now in harmony to that tune. Great, now it is stuck in my head. Curse that Bard; curse that band known as Inquisitor Betrayer. What honor do they have to make such music as to entertain demons and monsters? No honor has that Bard to play such spell driven music. But such great music it is to hear.

Maybe that drink was a bit more than I could handle, where was I? Oh yea, Grendel’s mom. Sneaky is she. She must have been watching while I left the Great Hall to visit another house I was invited at by this fair maiden. Hum, better not speak of such things I did there but fun I had while there! Such things are boastful only to younger men who have nada else to brag about. I am the Great Beowulf! I need not speak of my deeds with women.

Yes, Grendel’s mom came looking to find who did in her demon son. She did not find the object she sought but laid waste to another. The King’s trusted guard took my place this night. She took his body and the shoulder of Grendel back with her to whatever Hell’s mouth she came from. All I know of that night was I was summoned the next day by the King to answer some questions. I could have stayed in that warm bed with my chosen maiden a while longer. Such rudeness. So after much bantering and bickering, some funny stuff too, we decided it best to maybe head off toward the tracks so well laid out for us to follow. Simple this should be, just follow the green slimy path. After all I am the Great Beowulf, Killer of Demons! What is one more to add to my list of deeds? Not to mention, perhaps some more of that treasure, good food and drink. I could use a few more nights with a few maidens afterwards.

What I thought was such a simple ride turned out to be a long tenacious path into an area that is just horrible. I thought of Tenacious D but the Bard knew naught these tunes. I offered to get him a pick such as they had, only to cast upon by eyes I would swear was the devil’s own. No humor with this Bard. At the end of this path was the King’s Trusted Guard’s Head. Laid out for all to see. I suspected a trap. From what I could see, demons and monsters of all kinds seemed to be near by and everywhere a trace of them. The stench was thick in the air.

I thought I heard a horn ring out. That Bard had the balls to correct me. He told me it was a Kangling. Freshly made from that guard’s own bones, a thigh bone to be exact. It was being played to summon the demons to have a meal. I am very sure this Bard was not so normal. I will watch my back around this soul.

Again I heard this horn like sound. Again that darn Bard corrected me; this time it was two horns I heard. One a bit higher in pitch that the first one. For some reason I thought Fanfare for the Common Man was about to be played. Again that Bard gave me a look that just drove deep into my soul. I whispered to my fellow warrior, good friend Wiglaf, and long ‘time traveling’ warrior next to me, remind me never to take this Bard fishing.

What many did not see, I did, the ghost of this guard being tortured by the demons of the area. I see dead people. That is my leverage often with the living. They tell me things too. That can be very important. What I heard this day was not for the living to hear. I got off my horse, walked to the mouth of what looked like a cave. I am not fearful of such demons. I am Beowulf, Killer of Demons. I step inside, a trick it was. I fell into water. Those behind me watched me go down. Snakes everywhere. I am sure they could see more than I as I had my eyes on where the Hell I was going.

Down I went, then all of a sudden, something grabbed me, I lashed out. Did not any harm with all that was that. I lashed out again. Again this grip was mighty. I decided I do a bit of the grabbing too. So I did. This time I got paid back with some claws. Sharp they were. Well seasoned with the venom and stench of a demon’s last meal. If it were not for my armor I would be crushed and torn to shreds. My sword was useless to this skin or scales or whatever it was. It dawned on me; this was Grendel’s mom. About the same time, I was tossed onto a mountain of treasure, swords and piles of bones. Not a sight for the faint, no not at all. A eerily green glow was given off by this to light this darkness. I was sure that no sunlight has ever found it’s way to this place. No sign of God’s Will either anywhere. But by my luck and will, I reached for a something to defend myself. My hand was true, driven by God it must have been. I found a sword. I weapon of old and powerful. A sword made by the giants, victory blessed it was. I swung that sword and it met flesh, if that is what you can call it. Deep it traced a long line, dividing what might have been bone and flesh into equal parts. Quick I was with it as I am the Great Beowulf, Demon Killer. This demon fell. Fell hard. I took a trophy to bring back. I removed its head.

I looked around; looking was I for how to get out of this deep pit. I did not even notice that the place was now lighted by proper light, not that demon eerily glow as was before. So anxious was I to leave, I placed the sword in my sheath, for that sword will surely work well in the battlefield. It was at this time I noticed, the blade had melted like ice in a hot summer’s sun. Just the handle remained. I thought about taking some of the other treasures I see but a pain of alarm rose in my head. I believe these things cursed. I only kept in my hands the head of this demon and the hilt of the sword. As proof of my deeds. The only way out was to swim up thru the roof of water, such as this upside down hell pit was.

Up I swam. Up and up. Had I fallen this far below the waters? When I did come up, or down or ? I was met by only a few. A few loyal warriors. All the rest had left many hours ago in thoughts of my demise. I could not believe how much time had gone by since I first entered the cave. I held my proof up for all to see. I am Beowulf, Killer of Demons! It was at this time I noticed, the head I had, was that of Grendel. Confused I am, so I kept quite. Let others hear a few of my words and let them draw the conclusions out. So long as I am honorable and my deeds of greatness are spoken. Who am I to care if they add a few things here and there? And did they do. In the end, I was happy with the outcome. Many days of not remembering happen. Many… If I may be so bold as to say “I partied hearty!”

I said one of my deeds at the start. Since I have your ear and I have been pleased with your company so far, I will tell you of another, more recent this happen.

For 50 or so Earth years, you know, the old world that was blue, they counted years by it’s great swing around it’s star, the one we call Sol these days, I ruled my lands. I had become King, again from my great deeds was this bestowed upon me.

It so happens that just a few years back, times were getting tough. Our climate had changed a bit, food was getting harder to grow, some fresh water supplies had all but gone and so on. I should not have to bother to tell you these things at all, they still are. Lets get on with it. A traveler stumbled upon a treasure, not too different from one I mention a while back. He took a cup. A special cup. A cup so special a Dragon had called it, his own. This Dragon, not being without feelings, had feelings of loss in this case with a taste of revenge. This Dragon let this be known throughout the lands, he was just not happy. He wanted his cup back. I had heard of the long story of the tale of why this cup was so special but it has nada to do with me, the Great Beowulf, Killer of Demons and in the Service of his Fellow Man. Good King am I. Truth be told, I was fine until this darn Dragon burned down my mead hall. Causing me to go without drink and money since I could not sell my Mead. Curse this Dragon. Ok, he also burned down the a good deal of the kingdom and killed a great deal of my customers. Why would anyone walk into a burned out Mead Hall, sit on a burned stump and order a cup of mead that was boiled? Not to mention no roof and the low down Dragon flying overhead breathing all that fire down at any who did walk in, toasting them to a crisp. How was I to make a profit? So I said to myself, as most had run away, this has to change. How dare this Dragon insult me and my customers, I am the Great Beowulf, Killer of Demons and soon to be Killer of this Dragon!

So, being the King, I gathered an army to ride with me to fight this Dragon. After all, there will be a need for a few to help me cart off the meat of this delicacy. Well I did have to call in some favors. I have a few other deeds to tell on the why the favors and if it pleases me to tell you, I will. I am sure many here can fill you in on the details too. I might be busy with my drink and maidens later anyway.

Ok, back to this deed. I learned of a few who could lead us to where the Dragon lair was. I also was told of a great deal of treasure there and how others had plans amongst themselves to do this Dragon in and keep the spoils. Already a feud was a brewing among these adventures or shall I call them pirates? Some of them I knew so I will be kind. They only lust after things that I the Great Beowulf, Killer of Demons and in the Service of his Fellow Man. Good King am I. Have or have done. Silly these commoners are. Well I did slip up and said I would kill this Dragon in a rude boast when I ran into this lot. Funny thing that Bard of long ago, he was among them. Playing Inquisitor Betrayer as well. He did not look as if he had aged at all. I mentioned all of this too in that boast or shall I call it, my ‘proclaimed order’? So what is one more deed to speak of, I have done a great many. Why not do this deed too? I have just cause and I am right.